Friendship, gratitude, and hope

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. Proverbs 17:17

Friendship is a multi-faceted thing. I have lots of friends and am grateful for how God weaves people into the fabric of my daily life. Some are sort of like main characters in the drama and comedy that is my current life: wife/motherhood, homeschooling, Christian living.... Then there are others who have guest appearances for a time, and then our paths become divergent for a while. We reconnect, and maintain a casual relationship, but they are not folks I talk to daily. We all have those lifelong friends who have been through so many ups and downs with us, that we will always remain close, despite some breaks in frequent communication. Some of those lifelong friends have been friends for over 20 years, and some are more recently gained. I'm amazed at how I think that I have such a full heart, blessed with sisters, not of blood, but of tears, laughter, common focus, and then God brings another precious friend into my life. It's a blessing to learn and grow from them.

This post is about one of those friends that I didn't go looking for, but whom God placed in my life to challenge and stretch me in great ways. The fact that our common bond was initially forged through homeschooling and parenting wasn't even that apparent. We weren't close friends though we traveled in the same circles, lived in the same little town, and our kids belonged to the same sports team and school groups. We knew of each other, had emailed some, and smiled and nodded when we crossed paths. I knew of her reputation as a mom and someone who was involved in her family's life to a wonderful extent - her priorities were her family and God.

The way we became friends was through loss. Our friendship's foundation is built on grief. That's a hard way to learn the ins and outs of a person, when they're most vulnerable, and could be so fragile emotionally. It's also a way to grow to deeply love a person, when you share their great heartache and see them emerge through the darkest days, determined to be stronger, to fight through the pain, and to live, even when it would seem easier to just give up on life. Friendships typically are a blend of giving and taking, and sharing the burdens and the joys. When grief is involved, you can't go into a relationship expecting anything of the other person, but must be willing to only give. What I found though, was that my friend still gave, even when she was heartbroken and in gut-wrenching pain. She responded kindly, encouraging me, and was always patient with my questions, and my awkward stumbling through conversations as I tried to not hurt her when we talked. Gradually, I shared more, and she answered my wonderings about many subjects with her opinions or experiences, and we had more and more moments of laughter and normalcy. 

Today, I can't imagine not having this friend as a confidante and example to follow. She has given great amounts of time to my own working through grief, and never says she can't listen, or it's too hard on her. She continually points to God as her source of strength through the years since she lost her daughter, and hers isn't a newfound faith. Her dependence was on Christ before Abigail was killed, and has only grown greater since that day. Her testimony is powerful and she is determined to give Him the glory for any good that has come out of their family's tragedy.

Thank you Brandy, for being my friend, and for being a shining light of Hope, that honors our Lord, and your sweet girl.

Elijah is 13 months old!

Disclaimer: I have to post all these things here, because some day I'll actually catch his baby book up from these notes! Please feel free to scan quickly or ignore if you're bored to tears. I know grandparents do enjoy reading these milestones though!

Mama and sweet E
Elijah is now walking everywhere and it is so great! He started slowly, back in December, but was still more comfortable crawling for a while. The first week of January was when he really decided to take off. He is so cute, and very funny with his little wide stance-waddle. You should see him dance. I'll have to post video of him on here. He is eating well, finally, and likes to try what we eat, after first resisting most textures. The only thing I buy just for him is Yobaby yogurt, and he loves it! He eats grapes, bananas, apples, cucumbers, beans, sweet potatoes, pickles, yogurt, and cheese the best. He enjoys cheerios, crackers, and goldfish too. He will try most anything, and so mealtime is easy now, as we just give him samples of our food. He had steamed broccoli and carrots when I made Chinese this week, and those were a big hit. He isn't a fan of milk or juice, still preferring Mama for now. He seems insulted by a sippee cup, and throws his head back or pushes it away. Our baby boy has a bit of a temper, but his outbursts are short-lived. He tends to be dramatic, like a certain girl we know, and will melt when I put him down sometimes, sobbing into his hands while he lies face-first on the floor. We are working on nipping that in the bud.

Drama King

Thankfully, Elijah is communicating a little with words like more, bye bye, and does signs for both of those, says Mama, and Dee for daddy, and has a word for milk now ("meh!" said in a very happy voice when it's time to nurse), and he has expanded his animal sound repertoire too. He is hilarious calling Merlin, our sweet, big, old cat. He "meows" for him, and pats his leg, like he is calling him, and over and over will say, "Mer, mer, mowww, mowwww..." That crazy old kitty comes too, and just lets him love all over him. It is precious. He loves Sugar, our lab, and calls her too, saying "Woof woof, woof woof," for her. He's thrilled to see her from a distance, but when she gets close, he freaks. It makes me crazy, because she's so slow and gentle, and doesn't do anything to him, but he screams and acts like he's going to die if she comes up to him.

Based on our last appointment, Elijah weighs about 24 pounds, and is the 95th percentile for length, and just above average for weight. He does seem to have slimmed down some, or maybe it's that he's just longer. His belly and legs are where he's the chunkiest, and so he is still "hammy," as James says. Those little chubby hamstrings earned him that name, and since he is such a cut-up, he's a ham in other ways as well. :-) He is cutting some new teeth, so will have 10 soon!

This past week, Elijah moved up to the toddlers class at church, and is doing well playing with other folks a little bigger than him. Having a big brother and sister around probably helped that transition be a relatively easy one. We still marvel at how precious he is, and Isaac and Abigail are amazingly kind and patient, even as he is getting into their things more. He has totally earned his various nicknames, such as "The Destroyer," "Bulldozer," and "Wrecking Ball." He's the cutest destruction crew I've ever seen!

Pre-Destruction














Dancing machine

10 months old!

This sweet pumpkin of ours is 10 months old! He is growing so quickly, and changing all the time, but is still a sweetheart that we all love tremendously. Elijah is becoming more dramatic and expressive, and in that respect, is taking after his sister in more ways than just having lots of cute dimples. He loves to wrestle with Daddy and the big kids, to play outside, adores our pets, and lights up when he sees the camera. He weighs about 23 pounds (75%), and is taller (95%) than he is chubby, but he's still plump enough for lots of squeezes. We've had lots of outdoor time lately, and this quick photo shoot the other night was for fun, with our pumpkins from the farm. Our kitties got in on the action a little too, and humored him. We're very grateful for every day we have been able to spend with our precious pumpkin. What a joy he is!

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Elijah is 8 months old!

I can't believe this baby boy has been OUT of me longer than he was IN me. The time is flying by so fast. Here's the update on him and some recent photos.

His royal chunkiness :

* has 6 teeth.

* can crawl very quickly.

* is pulling up and cruising around furniture everywhere.

* says some suspiciously "Mama" and "Daddy"-like sounds ("Mmmmmam" and "Dee" and "hey!"), and babbles and sings a lot.

* doesn't seem to ever want to sleep through the night again since he started teething with a vengeance, and unfortunately forgot how to sleep more than a couple of hours in a row.

* is eating some baby food again, after being on strike for a while (teeth, again).

* is quite a fan of Mama (and her milk). Yes, we've entered Separation 101. :-)

* loves to stroll around the neighborhood, and love on our pets. Sugar makes him so happy.

* has a huge fanbase, but no one can compare to his parents and adoring siblings' love for him.

* is a constant reminder of God's goodness and grace.

At least he's proportional

Tuesday was Elijah's 6 month check-up. He did great. He is quite possibly the most amazingly sweet baby ever. Well, no - actually he IS the most amazingly sweet baby ever, and charmed everyone who saw us.

The facts: He weighed just over 20 pounds, and measured 28" long. Can you say 97th percentile? No wonder my back gets tired of carrying him!

His head is in the 75th though, so at least he doesn't take after his sister, who was sent for a CT scan at this age, because her head circumference had increased so much the doctor thought she may have a brain tumor. No, I'm not joking. Thankfully, she was diagnosed only with genetic maximus cranium. The neurologist really said that. I replied, "Are you saying she just has a big head?!" He replied with a grin, "Yes, and it's a hereditary condition." (Have you ever?!)

Elijah is really so solid and snuggly and cute. He grinned a lot, and charmed the doctor's socks off with his awesome baby skills: removed her stethoscope, grabbed at the light on the otoscope, and touched her face. The pediatrician (not our usual one) loved on him, and just held him for a minute, complimenting his sweet chubbiness. She has great taste, and you know, she should be an expert since she sees lots of babies. :-)

The funny physical comparisons between my boys (which parents should never do, yet do often in spite of themselves) don't really matter, but are interesting. They are equally loved, and adored, and it's fun to celebrate the differences. God isn't boring with His creation, ever, is He?

At 6 months---

Isaac:
10 pounds, 1.5 oz.
22 1/4" long
tiny and slender
blond hair/blue eyes

Elijah:
20 pounds, 1 oz.
28" long
thick and juicy
brown hair/brown

6 months old!

Little Elijah is 6 months old tomorrow!! We can hardly believe it. Time is flying by way too quickly. He is still the sweetest, easiest baby I've ever been around. People who don't even know us remark in public about his sweet smiles and easy-going nature. We just absolutely never get tired of looking at him, playing with him, and talking to him. All of us adore Elijah's squeezably soft self. He gives the best kisses and snuggles. I love that Isaac and Abigail still find him fascinating and ask to hold him many times a day, and are so great at occupying him, caring for him, and entertaining him when I need help. They are a wonderful big brother and sister!


Here are pictures of E. exploring his new tooth and helping to hold the spoon while chowing down!

He has earned many nicknames in his half year of life, including:
- Michelin man
- chubby cheeks
- roly poly
- chunky monkey
- ol' cuteness
- potbelly piggy

Do you detect a theme? :-)

His recent talents and accomplishments:
- sitting up unassisted for brief stretches of time
- tiny bits of kicking/scooting on his tummy
- 2 bottom teeth came in this past month!
- weighs around 19 pounds, as best we can tell
- pulling our faces close with his chubby hands to give big
open-mouth kisses
- jabbering and squealing to get attention and "talk" to us
- reaching for everything, especially Mama and Abigail's hair
- chewing on a paci every now and then for comfort
- still nursing great, and sleeping 6-8 hours most nights!
- having fun eating peas, carrots, pears and apples with much
delight (rice cereal, not so much)
- attempting to drink water and Mama's milk from a sippy cup for
fun
- his eyes are dark brown now, and his hair is coming in light brown

10 weeks old

Our little Elijah is celebrating a milestone today, with his 10 week birthday. He is enjoying sleeping in the sling at the moment, feeling sad with congestion and some fever, unfortunately. He and Isaac have both had a hard week. Overall though, he has been the sweetest, most easygoing little fellow, and we're so happy to have shared this much of his life so far. Isaac and Abigail are enjoying interacting with him more and more since he now gives some smiles, giggles, and coos.

At his 2 month check-up Monday, Dr. G. was happy that even though he'd been feeling puny, he was still in the 95th percentile for his length and weight - 14 pounds, 10.5 ounces. He's quite a little chunky monkey, and enjoys eating often and whatever Mama has had. Like Abigail, he is an easy, avid nurser, with no tummy problems, and isn't negatively affected by my intake, for which I'm very grateful.

These are a few shots taken over the last month or so, of his precious features. Thank you Lord, for our sweet son!

"You're just an angel baby!"

That's what we said when taking these photos, in silly high-pitched voices. :-) Abigail and I had a photo shoot of Elijah, who was so tolerant and adorable throughout wardrobe changes and set adjustments. We were playing with tulle left over from the baby shower and also put him in a sweet gown, on a gorgeous afghan from my great-aunt. Then, there are a couple of other photos from this past week with his adoring siblings, too. This baby just is too fun and he makes us all smile so much. I don't think a day goes by without Isaac coming over to kiss E's head, saying, "I'm so glad I have you, baby brother," or Abigail cooing and cuddling him. He's started really focusing in our faces, giving the occasional intentional smile and gurgle and we just melt. We're all smitten with his precious personality and sweet features. I marvel everyday that he's here, and am so grateful to God for his life.

Tomorrow Elijah will be 8 weeks old! I can't believe how fast this time is flying by. Recent milestones besides smiling at us, include lifting and turning his head, and pushing off of our shoulders when we're holding him, and just propping up, holding himself steady. He's really strong and it cracks us up, because he looks so small, but is pretty controlled with some movements. His dark hair is thinning, and he has a receding hairline, but there's new hair growing back in already. He also has slept great this week; several nights I've slept 4-5 hours straight and that didn't even happen with Abigail till she was 4 years old!! Don't think I haven't pointed out this week that her 7 week old brother is nearly sleeping better than she is at 5 1/2. :-) Elijah weighs close to 15 pounds, as best we can tell. We'll know for sure next week after our 2 month check up. He's a little "potbelly pig," as we say, because of his physique, and grunting noises. ha!

There are more ooey-gooey baby photos to come - hope you don't get tired of them. Too many of our family live far enough away that they don't get to see and enjoy watching Elijah growing so fast, so I just HAVE to post photos often. I know - it's such a burden. :-)

Growing boys!

Today we had a pediatrician visit for both our boys. We had some questions about both, and a general physical for Isaac too. Elijah did great with his little exam and weighed in at 11 pounds, 2 ounces, so is thriving. He is so cute and chubby, and in the 98th percentile for weight and length. YEA! We also had a question about E's tongue, since I recently noticed it looked cute, but maybe a little different, and then Graced noticed it this week too. It is actually attached a little more than it should be in front, but Dr. G is laidback enough and said obviously it's not affecting his eating, so there's no need to worry about it. It won't affect speech, and we'll just see later on if there's a need to snip that tiny bit of skin.

Isaac has gained 10 pounds in less than a year, and for his very small start in life, at age 8 1/2, he's finally doing some catching up, since the ideal weight gain for most kids his age is quite a bit less than that. He's really eating like a horse these days, and is nearly the same height as many other friends who are his age, so we're glad about that too!

Abigail was glad to have no reason to really be checked out, and all in all, it was a nice, easy visit. We're so grateful for a great doctor who is patient and great with our kids.